Tag Archives: advice

Don’t Be Bitter

Bitterness is such a destructive thing.  Bitterness is something that can take you from doing great things to doing no-things.  Bitterness is so self destructive.  It’s like taking dynamite and placing it underneath a bridge and hitting the detonator.  Sure you make sure that you keep people that you’re angry with at a distance but at the same time you’re now trapped because of your destructive behavior.

I have played a popular online game for a few years now and all of the time that I have played it I have been at the very bottom level.  No matter how hard I tried or how much I wanted it I couldn’t do anything but be a bottom dweller.  It was this summer that I figured out why I was stuck in this level.  When I would play and I got frustrated with myself or others who were making mistakes I became toxic.  I would let my bitterness cause me to lash out at others.

After a lot of contemplation and recommendations from people who had been through the same things I realized that it was my attitude that was keeping me in the cellar.  Because when things go wrong and you start acting bitter it actually causes people to not be able to meet their potential.  Your chances of success become so marginally thin that you pretty much guarantee your failure.  This is a never ending cycle of self destruction.  You basically have to put yourself in land of make believe to cope with it.

The point is that you should make a conscious effort to not be bitter.  You’ll be amazed at the results. I stayed on that bottom level in the game for over 40 months.  When I changed my attitude it took me less than 4 months to climb out.  This is a principle that goes through all of life.

We Have No One Else to Blame

“Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, their glory is in their shame.  Their mind is set on earthly things.”  Philippians 3:19

According to a recent ABC poll 83% of Americans responded that they are of the Christian religion.  That’s a pretty big number.  According to polls over the years homosexuals make up anywhere from 1% to 3% of the American population.  Yet the will being displayed in government and in pop culture is the will secularists and supporters of the lgbt community.  Now how exactly is it that approximately 263,000,000 people are being dictated to by 3,100,000 to 9,500,000 people?  How is it that people that call themselves Christians allow the society they live in to become so ungodly that now as recently as just yesterday a Christian bureaucrat was thrown in jail because she would not issue marriage certificates to gay couples because it violated her conscience?

I’ll tell you how it happens and if you’re as angry as I am the first place you need to look is in your bathroom mirror.  You need to look there and get angry at the person you see staring back at you because that’s the person that let this happen.

I once heard my pastor say that the most popular face in the church is George Washington.  Because when the offering plate gets passed around that’s normally the only face you see in it.  The fact is that we have become a perverse church who’s god is in their belly.  Hey I’m just as guilty as anyone else so don’t think I’m up here on a soap box lecturing and pretending that I’m above this.

We show where our loyalties lie when we won’t come off with our cash.  We throw ol’ George Washington in the offering plate when we make $400/week.  We say we can’t afford anymore than that because of bills but our bills are things like the fully loaded cable package that we can’t live without or the 3 gallons of ice cream we have in the freezer.  Don’t make up excuses.  If you created a line item budget showing how much money comes in and how much money goes out and exactly what it’s going toward I’m 100% certain that every single one of us will find that we pay a lot of money for things that we don’t need and then turn around and act as though those things are necessities.  Meanwhile back at the ranch the damned farm is burning down and we let it happen.

What I mean is look at the amount of money that lgbt groups and secular progressives have spent on campaigns to change minds and look at how much money we have spent to change minds.  Try getting around town on 1$ in gas.  You won’t get very far and yet we try to accomplish the exact same thing as Christians.  We want to give like Ebeneezer Scrooge and expect to reap over flowing harvests.  But the woeful fact of the matter is that he who sews sparingly the same reaps sparingly.  And brother when we sew sparingly in our nation today we begin to see the deliberate and cruel treatment of Christians right out in the open even though we supposedly make up the majority.

Our gods are our bellies.  That’s the sad fact here in America.  We have placed money on a pedestal.  Paul called the love of money the root of all evil because he knew what we need to know and that is that money is a servant and it serves the desires of the person who has it.  We spend it to “get” things.  The modern church in America has become a black hole of desire.  We don’t want to come off with anymore than we have to because the rest of that money is like our own little fix.  It’s like our own little morphine drip.  We have become junkies and let our country go to hell on a moped.

Wake up Church of America.  We will soon find ourselves in quite a spot if we don’t change our ways.  I mean it’s already here.  Christians are being dragged into court and fined more money than it takes most people several years and sometimes a decade to earn.  Christians being thrown in jail and told to comply or else.  Like Solomon once said “Only a fool sees trouble coming and does not prepare themselves.”  Change your ways or else you’ll pay more than it would have cost you to save yourself.

Glory

Glory is something that most people want.  It’s something that we work hard to obtain.  I know that I personally dream of the moment I can bask in the glory of achievement.  Everyone of us has something we want to achieve or be great and we have an idea in our mind what it would be like to achieve this one thing.  There would be bitter sweetness to it no doubt but we can’t always put our finger on what this feeling would be like or what it is exactly.

In my mind…..glory is many things.  To me glory is a place.  Glory to me is the place where hard work and victory meet the spiritual.  To me it’s the place where we have a realization of what it feels like to be what God created us to be.  God made us to be winners.  But think about what happens when most people reach the top of the mountain.  They’re overwhelmed by the heaviness of the emotion that they break down weeping with tears of happiness.

Glory to me is when we get a little taste of what life is supposed to be like.  We live in a brutal world and it’s full of brutal people.  We sacrifice so much and we fight so hard to try to be victorious in this world.  When we reach that supernatural place we realize just how indescribably awesome the world God intended could be.  When we see where we came from and we look from the top of that mountain down to the valley we came out of we often find that we can’t see the bottom.  It’s being so far away from our problems we know that they can’t reach us.  We could die and that would be preferable to going back down.

But we do come back down from this place because our poor earthly bodies can’t handle being on the top of the mountain.  So we drift back down.  But when you experience glory know that if you love God you will have the promise of being there forever.  So you can fight and claw in this tough world but just remember that if you’re lucky enough to get a taste of glory that it’s just a very small down payment on perpetual glory.

Ironic Thought of the Day

There is a story that I have heard many times in my life from many places about some things that are supposed to happen one day after you’ve died.  The story isn’t always the exact same but it generally goes something like this….When you’ve died and you go to heaven before you’re let in Jesus is going to replay every moment of your life.  And you will be incredibly ashamed of the things you’ve done when you thought nobody was watching.  The moral of this story is that you weren’t supposed to do things that were sinful because you will be exposed one day.

I haven’t thought about it until recently but it seems like kind of a ridiculous story.  I mean God goes through all of the trouble of taking the ultimate punishment for sin but then suddenly he has to shame us one last time before we go off into eternity?  That is frankly one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard and frankly I wish that when I heard this as a child that I had the mental foresight and analytic ability to tell the people who told me this little story that it was the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

Think about it for just a second.  The insinuation is that God is so vindictive and thin skinned that he can’t just let it ago and that once he poured out his wrath on Jesus on the cross to judge sin that it just wasn’t enough?  That says more about human beings than it does anything else.  Because people are so flawed and insecure that they can’t let things go and they can’t truly forgive.  God says that he forgets sin when we repent.  But we project our own precious qualities onto God sometimes.

Just a side note but I always pictured this little meeting happening in a white walled office.  The apostle Peter walks in and pops the story of my life vhs in the vcr while they give me nasty looks.  Hahahahahaha.  Oh Lord what a life I’ve led.

What Are You Worth?

I have said for a while that I believe that being an artist (whether it is an actor, singer, painter, etc.) is an incredibly dangerous profession because so much of your success is determined by whether or not people want you.  This isn’t like an inanimate object that you are producing on an assembly line.  You are the product.  The more successful you are the greater the risk of being greatly injured when the crowds of fans aren’t there anymore.  I believe that’s part of the reason why we see so much dysfunction in Hollywood.

But recently I started to re-frame my perspective on this idea.  Because I think that it exists in more basic ways and its implications are far-reaching.  What I mean is the idea that you have value based on what people can get from you.  There are so many people out there in the world that think that if they can please someone, they will feel better about themselves.  I know that in my own life I have had this notion in the back of my head at times.  But as I’ve gotten older I have tried to divorce myself of it, which has at times, caused me to drive into the ditch on the other side of the road which is denying people what they want because I simply do not want to give them that power.  Sounds a little twisted but I recently stumbled across a name that defines it.  It’s called “Cerebral Narcissism.”  I’m not exactly a narcissist, but I won’t get into that.  You can research it yourself.

But there is this idea that if I can just emotionally gratify someone, or if I can sexually gratify them then I will get the affirmation that I desire so much.  So what do we do?  We bend over backward.  We say yes when we know that we’re compromising ourselves and we should be saying no.  We think that if we can just get people to love me for whatever I am that I can put out this fire and finally have some contentment.  But unfortunately it doesn’t work.  Because it is the nature of desire to never be satisfied.

But we’re blind to it.  We don’t see it and so we get into relationships and associations with goals of being pleasing to someone else.  Don’t get me wrong I’m not saying we shouldn’t please people, it’s just not good to want to please people because our self-worth depends on it.  But even if we don’t acknowledge this principle in our heads we act upon it like it was pre-programmed in our very DNA.  We take it into our social settings and make judgments about people based on it.  Who do we want to be like?  We are envious and covetous of the lives of others.

Now I’m not saying that everyone is like that.  But I know many people who are.  I think this is why we as a society put so much stock into the things that celebrities say and do.  Think about it for a second.  Our favorite actor becomes an activist of some kind and we become micro-activists for the same cause.  Part of the reason why we listen to people about a variety of social issues is simply because of their celebrity status.  These people aren’t Plato’s Philosopher Kings.  They aren’t these mythical godlike creatures that possess all of this wisdom and hidden information.  They are mimes.  They are parakeets.  Yet we are so swayed by say.

I think the reason for this is because there is an algorithm or what have you, in our mind filter that sees their fame and their ability to please others and something just clicks inside of us that makes us want to believe them.  It makes us want to obey them because they are loved and if we can be like them then we’ll be loved and we’ll have value too.

But let me just say this.  Your value goes far beyond what you can do for others.  Your value comes from a God that created the entire universe and loves you more than you can ever know.  This is just my opinion but I think that if we could understand how much God loves us it would kill our earthly body.  I don’t think our poor old tickers could handle it.  But God loves you and you have value simply because He says you have value.  Because that part of your mind that is distinctly separate from your physical body comes directly from Him.  It’s a part of Him.  Don’t be a people pleaser anymore.  Love God with all of your heart.

Our Insane System

I remember when I was a young man….probably 18 or 19 years old going out to our local bowling alley and shooting pool several times a week.  It was a major (if not the major) hang out for young people at that time right around the year 2001 or so.  It was the southern Ohio place to be to find chicks, smoke weed, eat pills, drink beer, get some pizza and try to act cool.  It’s easy to see in retrospect that it was an incredible waste of time.

Back then we all had our own groups of friends and there were always a couple of people in the group that the followers would anoint as their tough guy and would often encourage them to get into fights or drag them into conflicts they had with other people.  I know because I got into a few altercations on the behalf of others more than once.

I remember one night at the bowling alley I got out of my car and realized that I was in the middle two groups who were squaring off to fight.  There were two big bruising looking dudes taking shirts off getting ready to throw down.  It didn’t take me long to realize that the fight wasn’t really between the two guys getting ready to fight, but rather it was between one of the guys getting ready to fight and a much smaller, mouthier guy who was standing behind his big nasty looking buddies.  When I say nasty, I mean they looked like they were the kind of guys that would eat a bag of screws for a snack.  They were big, mean and ugly.

This little guy talked the most trash you ever saw but he wasn’t going to fight his own fight.  I couldn’t believe it.  I still can’t really.  But anyway, the two big guys fought and it lasted for a minute or two and finally the little guy’s friend came out on top and won the fight.  There was a little blood and they were both exhausted.  The little guy was overjoyed that his friend won the fight.  He yelled, jeered and threatened the guy who he had the beef with.  I remember thinking how much it irked me that he was so much of a coward and a worm that he wouldn’t fight for himself.  Even if you think you can’t win a fight you still have to fight it; even if you have to change the conditions of the fight so that you give yourself a chance of winning.  It’s disgraceful to be a coward.

This is our society.

We live in a society where on any given issue there are usually two major sides.  Rather than fight our own battles we fight over who is going to control the strong men to fight our battles for us.  The strong men I am talking about are law enforcement officers and military personnel.  They are the ones that carry the guns and enforce the laws that the government creates.  If anybody opposes those laws it is then it is their duty to make you comply or imprison you.  And depending on your degree of resistance they will use their guns and their authority to kill you.

We fight over who is going to create the laws to have the strong men subjugate those that disagree with us.  Our society, our political system, is built upon creating a coalition of allies to force our will on those we disagree with.  I am frankly sick of it.

Weak minded worms are the ones who are looking for a way to have stronger men fight their battles for them.  I think it is about time that we started fighting our battles for ourselves.  I mean a perfect example is the recent article on Breitbart.com about a group of anti-government protesters who were having a flag burning in New York.  A group of veterans and bikers came to the rally with SQUIRT GUNS and the protesters scattered like cockroaches and actually asked for an armed escort from the very police that they were protesting against.  This is the liberal cockroach.  They are the young man in the parking lot at the bowling alley so many years ago.  They are the ones looking for the strong men to do their fighting for them.

When they know that nobody is going to hurt them because the strong men are there to protect them then they act disgracefully….just because they can.  But when their was a hint of uncertainty that other strong men weren’t going to stand for their pathetic bull**** then they scattered; begging the government to protect them.  I am fed up with it.

They have taken to our court system to use the strong man to elevate their position and give them the ability to subjugate those that don’t agree with them.  It’s coming.  A massive tidal wave of crap is coming.  They are going to use the force of government to try to cripple those that don’t agree with them.  It’s time for those of us who are strong as well to form our own coalition.  But the difference is that we will do our own fighting.  They want to take away our rights?  Tell them to come and get them.  We just have to have each other’s back.

The Confederate Flag

I am so very tired of hearing all of this politically correct talk about how southern states should not display the confederate flag because it is in poor taste and reminds people of the awfulness of slavery.  A lot of people are talking about southerners that proudly display the confederate flag saying that they are stupid, narrow minded bigots and say things like “southern whites have the shame of slavery running through their blood”.  They talk about how southern whites who display the flag are offensive and that the people should not have the state government display the flag above the state house because it’s so offensive.

To those people I would like to ask when the last time they, their parents, grand parents or great grandparents had to pick cotton against their will?  I have always been under the impression that slavery ended in the mid 1860’s.  I’m not going to get into liberal ideas such as institutional racism which can basically mean anything you want it to so long as it ends with white people being racist and owing blacks money and other perks as a result of their suffering.  That’s the ultimate end to those things anyway; what can you get from someone else without having to do anything for it.

Sometimes I think that people just want to be involved in something revolutionary for the sake of being revolutionary.  I feel pretty confident that if you look at the Facebook pages of the people that are so passionate about this issue with the flag that you will find that they were passionate about every major newsworthy event that has happened over the last few years.  Gays not getting pizza in Indiana?  Yep, outraged.  Pot being legalized in various states?  Yep, overjoyed cheering “we shall overcome”.  Illegal immigrants pouring across the border and being held in detention centers awaiting Obama’s next words on amnesty.  Dismayed and cursing the black heart of Americans.

I was always taught that being offended is the problem of the person who is offended.  I am progressively trying to learn how to not be offended.  I would recommend this for everyone else in the world as well.  Because honestly the confederate flag doesn’t mean white supremacy to most people that have it.  It’s a symbol of independence and southern heritage.  Get over it.  Stop being a weak minded pussy.  You should be more like me.  I started learning how to cope with things that bothered me when I became Cincinnati Bengals fan.  If I can get through that then I can get through anything.

Another thing I want to say is that it’s not fair for people to disparage southerners over slavery.  At the height of slavery only 6% of southern whites owned slaves.  That’s at the HEIGHT of slavery.  That means 94% of southerners had to pick their own damned cotton.  We won’t even talk about the 20% of freed blacks that owned slaves.  That stuff kills a narrative.

I think slavery is awful.  I think white supremacy is awful.  And I think bullying people with political correctness is awful.  I’m not afraid of what people think of me.  So that’s why I am just going to level with you.  This whole narrative about the confederate flag is nonsensical.  If you’re that sensitive then you probably have a lot more problems than a flag.